Patriots, some detrimental events occurred in our country recently. The Patriots from the real media (you know, the conservative one) are definitely not using these tragedies for their benefit by claiming someone declared war on the United States to start another ten years of money-through-warhawking schemes. Nor are they pushing some made up racist agenda! This theory being pushed by the radical left that conservative media would do such things is simply irresponsible.
The Lib’s insistence on repeatedly pushing these unfounded conspiracy theories is why we are starting a new series here at The Faux News, “Not Saying, Just Saying I Heard.” In this series, we will be exploring all of the rabbit holes the Deep State tries to take you down and wondering, “Where do they come up with this stuff?”
Today we are going to examine the ridiculous theory being pushed by “absolutely no one” on the left that rich conservatives planned everything from Donald Trump’s ear-grazing to the Cyber truck firework attack on the Trump Las Vegas Palace. Now, I sincerely doubt you will see the Deep-State putting a bunch of links to articles in this part of our blog, because “no one is pushing these theories.” A likely story!
This all started with the ear-grazing gunshot that our Superman of a president was able to survive. First, you may ask, how many of us could have survived a gunshot that pierced our ears? The answer is not many, folks, not many. We are just lucky that our strong man president did. It was so traumatic that he was able to push off a bunch of secret service agents who were trying to get him to responsibly flee the scene and then pump his fist and tell the MAGA world that peace is the best option by shouting, “Fight!” Those Deep State Libs have supposedly said that this was arranged by Trump supporters to show strength from our future president. If this were true, would we have arranged the bullet to only hit ear cartilage that is totally unnecessary for survival? Also, would we have arranged a perfect photo-op immediately after that some MAGAts say won us the election? Of course not, that is preposterous!
Then there was the second assassination attempt. Honestly Patriots, even I barely remember this one. Now, if we had organized it with Russia, wouldn’t we have done a better job of pushing it in the media? I think so. Our conservative media machine doesn’t let public discourse that favors us just die! Now they are saying that this second attempt made it seem even more like the first one was fake and so we dropped it; they’re wrong! Obviously!
Finally, the Deep State has had the gaul to say that we are pushing terrorist ties in New Orleans and Las Vegas for our own benefit. Is Prince Elon standing to make a lot of money through war contracts in our new administration? Yes. Are there shady backroom deals that are funding our president’s every move that would likely be increased by a new war? Yes. But this is all hearsay! Just because two things are likely doesn’t make them true! Would billionaires really sacrifice lives for the sake of profit? Never! In this case they LOVE to bring up the Iraq war. There probably were WMDs somewhere! Not that we MAGAts have any ties to the W, Bush has long since joined the RINOs and lost his popularity here in MAGA world; but still, there were probably WMDs! Conservatives would not create an entire war out of thin air for profit, seriously, stop laughing!
Anyway, Patriots, here ends the first in a series of debunking Deep State conspiracy theories. We at The Faux News hope you have appreciated the first in an attempt to bring to light and eliminate fake news coming from the Libs and their media machine!
Leave a Reply